Monday, October 21, 2013

3 year Memoradum

3 year Memorandum

Through life we sometimes travel not only a dusty road but one full of bumps and pot holes. Losing a loved one is about as rough as it can get.
On Oct 22nd /2010  I experienced the roughest ride of my life with the death of my wife, my lover, and my best friend.

Carole’s life 1942 - 2010

Carole had many health issues over her last ten years. Starting in 2000 when she had heart surgery, a rare tumor in her heart had to be removed. Then losing eyesight a result of mini strokes and blocked arteries. All during this time she suffered from Rheumatoid Arthritis. But! If you met Carole and asked her how she was doing.
She always said, I’m fine, she never complained.

I cried when my parents passed, I cried, when my brother passed. I cried for family and friends. They say crying is good. It is a healing process. None of it prepared me for the tears I have lost losing my most precious possession; My, beautiful wife. Nothing ever hurt this bad.

Life with Carole spanned from, Aug 1959  to Oct 2010.
It are those years in between that are so important.
Memories are all that are left.
We were a team for 51 years. And I have lost the most valuable player.

Carole and I met when she was in high school and just 15. I fell in love with her immediately. We married when she was 17..... Aug 1959. We had our first beautiful daughter (Tracey)in Dec 1960. Bought a house and set up a home.

Over the next 10 years we had 2 more beautiful daughters (Terri & Tania) and a two bedroom home; time to start looking for more space. We bought a new home in a survey and I wasn’t happy. I wanted country, she wanted city, and country won. She always did without for her family's  happiness.

It wasn’t long before she was the happiest person in the country. She had a wonderful neighbors and friends. The kids were happy, I was happy. The world revolved around one big happy family. She cemented us together as a family. I do believe, she invented crazy glue before they bottled it.

Kids grow, start their own families, and move on. We were blessed with 3 wonderful daughters, 3 great son in laws and 7 grandchildren to be proud of.

Grand children were her number one priority. She loved them all.... equally. She was like a Momma bear in a honey hive when surrounded with her kids. The special family gatherings were important to her and that is how she left this world; Surrounded at bedside with all her family as she struggled to stay with us for just a few minutes longer.

I wish, I could stop for a commercial break and turn back the hands of time. I wish, I could say....sorry, for not protecting her. I wish, I could hold her and say 'sorry' for the times, I was a asshole. I wish, I could wave a magic wand and make every thing right. I wish, most of all, that my prayers were answered.

For 51 years no matter what transpired, we always kissed each other goodnight. Never went to bed angry.
Thank you Carole, for a life time of love.....I love you forever.

Put your arms around her Lord
Treat her with special care
Make up for all she suffered
And all that seemed unfair.
With only memories for us to keep
These are the words she would reply
“This life for me has truly passed
I love you all to the very last.
Weep not for me but courage take
And love each other for my sake.”

My biggest wish in life is that my girls and their families remain close friends. That is all I have left. So far, I have not been disappointed.

Kindness is the language which the 
deaf can hear and 
The blind can see.
- Mark Twain